If I Could Turn Back Time
by littlelyingmilly
Summary: A Jaria fanfiction. He was on her mind every day, every night. He'd be the first name she'd say in the morning and the last before she went to bed. He'd be the one entering her dreams and nightmares. He'd be the one leaving her broken yet he'd be the one leaving her whole. If I could turn back time, she thought every night, what would I do differently?


**A/N - Yes, I know what you're all thinking - I've just started a Jaria story and now I'm starting another one. Lol. I know there are many fanfictions like this, Aria wishes she could be with Jason after she rejects him bla bla bla but this is DIFFERENT. Sort of. Lol. This is set beginning of Season 5. In this, Ezra never really loved Aria and never got shot. Enjoy!**

 **Oh and BTW, I will update Love's Winner soon :)**

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Chapter One  
If I Could Turn Back Time

{ _I didn't really mean to hurt you  
I didn't want to see you go_}

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 _I was telling you in the off chance you might feel the same way._

He was on her mind every day. He was the first name she said in the morning and the last in the night. Her dreams were about him only, nightmares, daydreams... He was the reason she spent an hour crying every day but the only reason she smiled.

Aria sighed as she closed her eyes. It might have been a year since their kiss, but it had been barely an hour since their last fake one.

Thinking about him hurt. That night, she'd hurt him and made him think she was scared of him. God, Aria being scared of Jason? But then why did she never talk to him, telling her that she _did_ feel the same way, even in the off chance? Because she was scared of being rejected. Aria had been hurt many times in love, and she didn't want to risk another heartbreak.

Especially now, after Ezra, her long-time boyfriend had basically said that all Aria had been was a tool to write a crime novel about Alison. He'd never loved her - not even for a split second.

Aria had been upset, but in a way...relieved. After Ezra was out of the picture, she realised that the only reason she had been with him was to keep her mind of Jason, the one guy who had her heart.

She'd loved him since she was a little teenager. And as the years went by, she'd loved him even more. Then why did she reject him on that sidewalk?

Even Aria didn't know the answer to that.

 _Taking a study break?_

Jason had come back...changed. Since the elevator accident, he seemed to be avoiding all the girls. To be honest, Aria didn't blame him. It was mostly their fault Jason even got hurt in the first place!

 _If I could turn back time_ , she thought every night, _what would I do differently?_

Jason had been there for her when Ezra hadn't. He'd been there for her when she didn't deserve anything. He'd loved her and cared for even when she'd hurt him and broke his heart a million times.

 _More like a sugar break._

She wished she could've done it differently. She wished she could've told him she was available and kissed him just like she had wanted to. She should've broken up with Ezra then. She could've been happy with Jason. She could've actually trusted a living person with her _life_.

 _I'm sorry if I stepped out of boundaries before. I was really just trying to help._

Every memory of Jason had been somehow burned in his mind, there to show her how stupid and reckless she had been, choosing the wrong guy.

Oh, she wished she could turn back time.

 _The truth is, I do care about your brother but...I also care about you._

That was when the first tear trickled down her face. It could never happen. Maybe in a billion years, but time was time. No turning back, only turning forward.

She thought about the basketball court, the cemetery and even the grill. Then she thought about the police station.

 _Please...I made a terrible mistake and I need you…_

Her friends had thought she'd called Ezra. But she hadn't – Ezra probably just found his way to the station because all of his secret hidden cameras and mikes.

She'd called Jason.

And he had come. For her.

Just another time he had been there when she didn't deserve it.

A second tear trickled down her cheeks. Jason had needed her many, many times. He needed her now. Right now. He needed her to be with him while Alison was now home.

 _I'm sorry,_ she thought, _but I've fallen hopelessly in love with you. Right from that kiss on that sidewalk...no, before. From they day I first laid eyes on you. When I had pink hair._

Aria smiled weakly at the memory. Then...

 _Hey, I miss that pink hair!_

Aria slapped her forehead, trying to get rid of all her Jason thoughts. Then she laughed at herself - that would be impossible.

 _You can't stop thinking about me, can you?_

Aria groaned as she placed her pillow on her face. She tried to shut out all the noise, but Jason's voice echoed in her head.

 _I get it, you're unavailable._

Suddenly, Aria felt...calm hearing Jason's voice. He was like her shield. Slowly but eventually, she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep, thinking about how life would be if she'd chosen Jason.

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 **A/N - So this is really short but I'll have the next chapter down later on today. I hope you like it so far!**


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